New posts coming soon...finally!

Stay tuned for new posts coming soon! One post on "Following God's Will" and another on "The Body."

What are you doing?

I've thought a lot lately about what I'm doing for God, about how my daily life is reflecting on Him, making Him smile or cry, in essence, I've thought a lot about my witness. Ever since God has opened my eyes to see Him for who He is and to love Him (only about 5 months ago), I have been so excited about my faith! I've really understood that there is no greater love, no greater hope, and no other place that I could put my trust other in God. Along with this excitement comes this desire on some level (although admittedly that "level" is really small right now) to share this news with others. I feel like I caught this great thing on sale and I have to tell everyone to run to the store to receive this gift! I'm definitely not one to walk up to people and share my faith or the love of God (aside from trying to treat people with love and kindness), but I should be, we are called to be.

Semi-tangential but relevant side note:

I am thankful that God has begun to make me more aware of my ways, my behavior, and my thoughts. Being aware of these things help me to sort of check myself and listen when the Holy Spirit is grieved by something I do. I am now of a mindset that I do not want anything to impair my witness. I want people to know by my actions that I am a representative of the most high. God has really begun a work in me and He's showing Himself mighty daily as He constantly reminds me when I say something not very nice, think something I shouldn't, snap at someone just because of course when I'm having a "moment" it's that person's fault lol.

Our witness is all we have to share the good news with others, we are to be "imitators of God." (Ephesians 5:1) In that I think that our actions speak louder than out words. How can I tell people about the good news and how will they believe me if I don't look different, if my lifestyle isn't different, if I myself haven't been changed. How can we speak of His amazing glory and immeasurable power if, by the way we live, He can't even change our habits? Those of us who are believers owe it to those who have not yet heard the good news and to fellow believers to wear our salvation on our sleeves so that we can actually share the good news without contradiction or restriction. I don't want to give the impression that I think that I've somehow got this all down and that I don't make mistakes, I MAKE MISTAKES ALL OF THE TIME! I'm broken, forever and always BUT because of God's GRACE He's mending what's broken and ever forming me into the person He created me to be, and that's what a lot of this Christian walk is about, it's an active relationship. There's no stalling, hanging out, just looking around, God is always moving, working and forming you. But we have to be open to that, willing to listen when he calls our names, when He rebukes us, when we fall.

As we live out our faith, live out our relationship with God, we are showing others the great things that He has done for us. If He has done such a great thing by sending His only son to earth to take on all the sins of mankind, how can we not share this news, live our lives in a perpetual state of thankfulness and want to draw near to Him constantly? I'm not sure how we do it, but we do, I have done it, I still do it, and I know a lot of us do, but it's through God's grace and mercy that He will work in us if we are obedient and willing to give up the things that everyone in this world strives towards and look only to Him.

I know those last two paragraphs are somewhat tangential but as I was typing that's the message that came through my fingers, I hope it helps someone, it's helpful even to me. But back to discipleship, this message by Francis Chan really spoke to me about making disciples out of people...I'm praying that as I delve into His word and understand His ways that He will raise me up to be one to make disciples out of men, maybe carrying about my witness is a baby step in that direction.

I hope you are as blessed by this message as I have been.

http://www.cornerstonesimi.com/special/media_player.html (Sermon, 5/23/10 "Love God Love People" Francis Chan)

...And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever

Yes, the title of the post is a reference to Psalm 23:6 but the substance of this post is about Psalm 37.

Psalm 37 has so many nuggets of wisdom and gives us a great view into God's heart, his desires for us, and shows us how much he loves us. After I read it I kept thinking about how good life is, how comforted you are, and how bright your outlook is when you "dwell in the house of the Lord." Being in God's presence is indescribable! It's amazing!

The following verses resonated with me, they all talk about the benefits of drawing near to the Lord. It's funny how life can come around and sweep us away from what really matters, take us away from true satisfaction and comfort. We tend to seek those things by looking to other people, shopping (my former outlet, working on changing that, haha) or other vices. I have experienced plenty of times in my life when I was not dwelling in the Lord but merely visiting or on occasion staying overnight but those temporary visits are nothing compared to dwelling in the Lord, there is love there that is unimaginable.

Psalm 37:3-5 reads:

"Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun."

Psalm 37:23-24 reads:

"If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand."

These verses illuminate God's desire for us, and what he will do for us if we stay near to him. He wants good for us and he is a protecting God. It's easy to see here that God's character is like that of a father, one who protects his children (children here being those who draw near to him). There's much comfort in knowing that good protects his children, loves them and wants the best for them.

Stay blessed.

No Other Place I'd Rather Be

I've come to the realization that while I have lived a good and blessed life up to this point (God's hand has really been on me and has guided me through), I have spent more time in this life away from God than with Him. He has really awakened me and showed me through His Spirit that there is no place to be other than in His presence. God is so great that he wants us to constantly be with Him, around Him, he cries out for us to be next to Him. It's so great to know that we serve a God who is attentive to our every thought an cares for us so much that no matter who we are, he wants us to be around him despite our shortcomings!

God is so good and his mercy endures forever. It has become clear to me in the recent weeks that God really does desire us to be close to Him. I was reading Revelations 2:12-17 last week and God revealed to me in his letter to the compromising church of Pergamum that he desires us to be with Him. He warns us to be careful and to hold on to our faith and overcome the temptation to compromise. This passage spoke volumes to me because life works so much better when we hold on to our faith and our relationship with Christ.

Also, in this word, Jesus speaks of giving a white stone with a new name written on it. That new name belongs to the one who overcomes, who remains strong, it speaks to me like a second salvation, he continuously wipes the slate clean for us and rewards us when we choose Him. That's wonderful. Praise God! All of these things assure me that there is no other place that I'd rather be, thank you God for saving me.

Revelations 2:12-17 (NIV) (courtesy of biblegateway.com)

To the Church in Pergamum

¹²"To the angel of the church in Pergamum write:
These are the words of him who has the sharp, double-edged sword. ¹³I know where you live—where Satan has his throne. Yet you remain true to my name. You did not renounce your faith in me, even in the days of Antipas, my faithful witness, who was put to death in your city—where Satan lives. ¹⁴Nevertheless, I have a few things against you: You have people there who hold to the teaching of Balaam, who taught Balak to entice the Israelites to sin by eating food sacrificed to idols and by committing sexual immorality. ¹⁵Likewise you also have those who hold to the teaching of the Nicolaitans. ¹⁶Repent therefore! Otherwise, I will soon come to you and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth. ¹⁷He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.

Moving Forward and How Deeply I Need You

These two songs have blessed me in a special way. Praise God!

Moving Forward - Israel Houghton Live Video Here

How Deeply I Need You - Shekinah Glory Ministries Song Here

Be Blessed.

Blessed Break-Up

I have been so blessed this weekend as I attended the IGNITE 2010 Young Adult Conference at the Brooklyn Tabernacle! The word brought forth by Francis Chan was amazing, the outreach we did in the community, also amazing and finally, the Israel and New Breed Concert such a blessing! I had been talking with a friend of mine for about a month leading up to the conference about how great it was going to be but I had NO idea what God was really going to do, God exceeded my expectations and showed up and showed out! I walked away from this conference with a sense of urgency, feeling that a necessary change in my life has to happen NOW. I'm breaking-up with my sin, I'm letting go and moving forward. (Israel Houghton - Moving Forward)

The Break-up: Francis Chan spoke about the Fear of God, that we don't understand the fear of God, and that the fear is not a reverence but an actual fear of his mighty power. This God we serve once destroyed the entire earth because it wasn't pleasing to Him. We need to understand that God does not take our sin lightly like we do, we rely on grace and mercy (we rightly should) as our solutions to our sin instead of as an emergency reserve. We should be striving to live like Christ, not to do what we want to do and hope that we have breath when we're done doing what we want so we can pray for forgiveness and receive his grace and mercy.

Encouraging and Eye-Opening verses:
Ecclesiastes 12: 13-14 "Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil." Here, the Word says that our whole duty is to keep the commandments, not just when we want to or our part-time assignment, but our whole assignment. Wow! Then the Word says that God will bring every thing into judgment, good or evil. We can't hide from God, he's all knowing and all-powerful.

Luke 15:11-32 tells the Parable of the Prodigal Son. So many of us have read this story several times but when I read this last night, I saw something new. The son squandered his wealth in wild living and then thought, I will go back to my father, his father welcomed him and loved on him. How many of us depend on this parable to justify in a sense, our sin or to say, I'm a twenty-something, I just have to get this out of my system and then I'll go back to God after I'm done? I've said it! Thank God that he gave me another day to live so that I could be here now in this time and repent and pray for the Holy Spirit to help me to break-up with my sin! Praise God for sparing me, he could have taken me, in my sin and ignorance but he spared me...how great is He? We know this parable but we don't consider the Fear of God and who we really serve, how can we be so lax with sin, we don't know when we will be taken off of this earth, when our last day will be and we know that God will judge everything that we have done. We need to have a sense of urgency about following Christ because it is serious, it is literally life or death.

The message this weekend has really been about getting serious with your Christian walk. Who are you to others and who are you to God? (Reputation vs. Character) I am in a new phase in my life and I want to please God, no matter what others may think, no matter what my current friends or family will think, no matter how unpopular it may make me, I want God to be pleased. When I leave this life, I want to meet my Father and my Savior and hear the words "well done." I can't take my reputation on this earth with me, I can't take my family with me, I can't take my belongings with me when I leave, only my spirit will be facing the Lord and I want him to be pleased because I love Him.

I'm so grateful for this weekend, for this message, for the conviction, and for the sense of urgency, the strength and the desire to serve my Lord. I prayed before I wrote this that the Holy Spirit would follow through me, and I think He has, I hope that you are in some way as edified by this post as I was by my experience this weekend.

God Bless!

Tunnel Vision

I've talked a lot about surrender in my last two posts. Something that is buried in the idea of surrender is the idea of Tunnel Vision. This term came to me in church tonight as one way to think about living a life of surrender. I've been coming across Romans 8:5-17 several times in the past month or so and every time I read it I become overcome with gratefulness to the Lord for change and for Tunnel Vision.

Romans 8:5-17:

⁵Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. ⁶The mind of sinful man^e]">[e] is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; ⁷the sinful mind^f]">[f] is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. ⁸Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.

⁹You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. ¹⁰But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. ¹¹And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.

¹²Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. ¹³For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, ¹⁴because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. ¹⁵For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship.^g]">[g] And by him we cry, "Abba,^h]">[h] Father." ¹⁶The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. ¹⁷Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

(passage copied from biblegateway.com, NIV)

For me these verses speak volumes. They are essential to understanding what it means to live a surrendered life, a life of following. As I embark on this journey of changing my life, not by my will but God's Will, I am learning how to do it in a practical manner. What does it mean to be like Christ daily? We can learn from examples from Jesus time of ministry but the whole Bible of course serves as an example of how to conduct ourselves in a way that is pleasing to the Lord. For example, Romans 8:5-8 shows us that we should strive to be focused on things that the Spirit desires, at all times, not on what our sinful selves desire. (Notice I say "strive", I use that word instead of leaving it out of the sentence because it's something that we work towards, walking this Christian walk, it's a daily exercise). God changes our focus once we surrender to him and we get this Tunnel Vision, we are seeking things that please His Spirit, not things that grieve Him. For me, the idea of Tunnel Vision is helpful because I imagine a narrow area that is acceptable to the Spirit. I don't use narrow here in the sense that life in the Spirit is limited but narrow in comparison to all of the things that exist in the world and all of the behavior that is acceptable in the world. If I continue to think of this narrow area, I can populate that area with things that I know, through the Bible, about what the Spirit desires and strive for those things. (i.e., Galatians 5:22).

This Tunnel Vision is not a complete denial of the world as it is or the fact that we live in this world and deal with many unpleasantries, but I think this Tunnel Vision is a way to focus our actions and reactions. It's a way to make sure that we are constantly considering the Spirit and moving in the Spirit. My goal during Lent is to strive to work on my Tunnel Vision, to meditate throughout the day on things that please the Spirit, to walk, talk and behave in a way that is pleasing to the Spirit. I pray for wisdom that when I'm outside of the Spirit (inevitably this will happen) that the Lord is able to call it to my attention and that I can address it and grow from it. I hope that you would consider doing the same.

Delight in His Will and Walk in His Way

Retreat Day 1:

So, I'm actually excited about this experience to come. The last retreat I went on I felt spiritually overwhelmed and unprepared. I walked away defeated. (I think I probably went into it that way too). This time around I feel excited and ready for the challenge. My heart is in the right place now, a place of surrender and in a position where I'm ready to receive, to "step into my blessing" so to speak. I now know that God has a lot planned for me, that I don't want to do things my way anymore and that I want to learn what it means to be what He wants.

I decided about seven or eight months ago to surrender. I literally feel like I'm no longer in control. I've prayed that prayer and sang that song (I Surrender - The Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir) so many times but my heart was never 100% there. I never truly meant it because deep down inside I didn't want to change my life. I liked the control. I liked making my own rules. I wanted to surrender some parts of my life but not all of them. I'm almost positive in knowing that I'm not the only odd many out on this. I think as twenty-somethings, we want to live the life we see on TV and in magazines -- partying, drinking, clubbing, etc. I'm not judging ANY of those things because I've been there, I've desired those things and have lived that life to some extent. At times I've desired any one of those things more than I have God. I've indulged my flesh more times than I care to count. The only problem is that it has often left me feeling empty. After a night out of partying, I only feel tired the next day (sometimes a little hungover--I'm being honest here), sure I had fun but it was only momentary, it only lasted a few hours. The next day was un-filling and just another day. I think when you indulge your flesh and succumb to the things that the world would have you desire, you're always chasing that "high", that moment of excitement. It is so fleeting. It's like you have to fill-up your tank every weekend or weeknight just to "feel good."

I've found that the inconsistency of a life that desires the world only leads to unsatisfaction. Maybe it's me and my personality but I crave consistency, I think most people do. The world leads us to believe that consistency is boring, but how boring can consistency be, consistency here meaning the constant "fullness" one has in Christ, when you're always full. When you always feel complete and you don't have to "fill-up" as often becuase you are running on "eternal" gas.

In Christ our gas tank is always full. There's no need for the inconsistency because he is the same all the time. He is the same God who died on the cross and rose again, everyday, every weekend and every night. What truth and greatness is in that statement! I know now that I don't need to "fill-up" my tank every weekend and indulge the things that my flesh desires because my tank is full in Christ, that void is filled.

Life is changing and I'm following where he leads me, thankful that I'm not following myself anymore with my decisions only based on temporary happiness alone.

(I backdated this post because little did I know that the next day after I wrote this that at a group session at my retreat that the speaker would speak about the very thing I had thought about and meditated on the night before?!?! Talk about confirmation, the Holy Spirit and God talking to me, I hear you God, loud and clear! Of course the speaker had some biblical references to back up what I had been feeling and thinking the night before. See Ephesians 4:17-19 (also see 4:17-32)).

Ash Wednesday 2010

What ways do you honor God? Today you may be like many people walking around the city with a cross of burned palms on your head, I know I am. What does it really mean though? Why did you wake up this morning and think, "I better get my ashes today"? Was it just habit? Where was your heart today and where will it be for these next 40 days of Lent?

I'm writing these questions because I am not entirely sure that I myself have answers to them. I'm not sure that there are right or wrong answers but they are questions that are necessary on this day of reflection and sober thought.

Since 2010 has started I have been on a personal journey to discover the answers to some of these questions and above and beyond these questions, the ultimate question is looming...what does it mean to be a follower? What does it mean to follow Christ? The only thing I have learned is that it means an inward surrender. It means to realize that your life is not your own, to know that your plans for your life aren't nearly as great as His. It means to consider every thought you have and every word you say and to question whether the Holy Spirit approves. It means to think about his actions, his death for us when we didn't deserve it. It means to think about what it living with that knowledge, hope and love.

My hope for everyone during this season of Lent and beyond is that we can search ourselves for the thing that makes us who we are. That we can search ourselves for the ability to be a follower. That we can be a follower from the inside out, changing our thought life and then our outside. I hope that today the outward symbol on our heads is just the beginning of the revolution beginning to occur inside our spirit's.